I drew this picture inspired by Max Ernst. I loved his meaning behind his painting and wanted to replicate it because I felt that I related to it’s purpose. The paper rolling down shows what is in the mind above and the actual eyes of, in this case, me, underneath. I chose to draw the phases of the moon, differentiated from the original painting that has circular figures you can't quite make out. These phases of the moon interpret me well, I believe, because to me the phases of the moon are the phases of me and my life. There are times of darkness, with bad occurrences. There are times of brightness, with much positivity. And sometimes in life, there is also good within the bad and bad within the good. Which are the moments when the moon is half dark, half lit. Or even when the moon is mostly lit than dark or more dark than lit. I have been through alot in my life and those who are close to me are very clear on when my moon is shining bright or when my sky is completely filled with darkness. The times of darkness in my life, are just phases. Just as the good times are as well. Nothing in life is permanent and I have come to an acceptance of that. When those who are close to me look at me and what i’m dealing with, I think they almost expect me to be okay. They know I will be okay because with the help of the stars, metaphorically my friends and family, I will move on to the next phase when the time passes. My eyes are big and dark and often pointed out by many. Which is why I love drawing eyes often. To me, my eyes have the moon within them in a way. You can look into someones eyes and almost tell what phase they are going through. My friends and family can easily look into mine and tell if i’m in a moment of darkness or close to it. This depiction has nothing at all to do with stereotypes because nobody expects anything of me when they do not know me. Well, at least they don’t expect all the things I've been through or my mood of the day or year. You can’t look at me and think, oh she has big eyes so she has a curious mind. Or, look at her, she looks like she has been through a lot. Nobody knows. Unless you catch me on one of my days when I decide to dress in all black. Then, a stereotypical person may judge me off of appearance. But, I didn't choose to depict that here.

Creative Project #1

This mini photo collage is called "Fits Stereotype?".  I given the piece this name because of the stereotype that I feel society sees me as. The question mark is there because it's not true and I want people to think about what they are actually going to see before the collage is shown to them. For the image I used myself, my clothes, my phone, and Photoshop (nothing in the collage has been altered in size). For the image on the left side I turned myself into what today's society feel is a thug or a black male how is just up to no good. How I choose to take the picture is how I feel people who judge me based of that stereotype everyday. I made the image on the left side completely black, and made the other one white because that is the way people make their judgments (black & white). They base it off of prior knowledge (history, past situations, etc.). I feel that people do this because it's either easier for them to just believe that people of that race act/live this way or they're racist. the image on the far left side is of me, a person who is goofy, smart, complex, and educated. I am not a thug, I prove people wrong everyday by showing them that. It feels good to make the people who look down upon you feel stupid, when they realize that you don't fit the moled that they wanted to believe that you were apart of. I made the images on the left and right white because I wanted to make silhouettes of my goofy side. I feel that stereotypes will always exist in society because we have a pyramid of hierarchy and we won't let go of our preconceived ideas on other races of people.

Dream Big, Fly Free! ~

For my "self portrait" I decided to use my Forrest green shirt as a flat surface in which I place the other objects on top of. The shirt is from an anime called "Attack on Titan". It's the Wings of Freedom, also known as the Survey Corps. It symbolizes being free, and "the hope of mankind". In the anime these group of people fight for humanity after its been taken over by titans. They hope that someday their efforts will change the world and that they'll gain back what was taken away from them- their freedom. This is important to me because I believe that I can fly free in this world and no matter what happens I won't let anyone clip my wings. The skies the limit, right?

On the very top I placed a word made out of pink foam with sparkles on them- it reads "Dreams". I'm a dreamer. I think we all are. We have hope that one day our dreams will come true, whether they're big or small. Some live it (the lucky ones) and some are still getting there. It's a motivational word for me. It reminds me that my dreams are still there, and to never let anyone tell me that I can't dream because if I don't dream then what is there to hope for in my future. That's what I believe. It inspires me to continue pursing my dream which is to become a successful author.

On the right side is one of my journals. This one has my name on it. It was given to me by my best friend. She always supported me and my crazy dreams. When she gave it to me she said "write as much as you can. I know you can make. I believe in you." It's her support and my family's that drive me to write, write and write! I cut out a quote from a magazine that says "My American Dream" and placed it on top of my journal because becoming a novelist is my American dream.

I also love to read so I put a book on the left side. It's titled "Boy meets Boy". Also on the cover there is a small drawing of what's supposed to be me. My hair is in a pony tail and I'm wearing my glasses, smiling like always.

I don't think I've stereotyped myself however I feel like I did when I mentioned "My American Dream". I figured since we live in NYC this is the place where dreams come true. I've heard this all my life and I do believe that but some times it isn't easy that's why we need to work hard and be realistic. Although it doesn't hurt to believe in the unimaginable. Having dreams is what adds excitement in my life, and when challenges come my way I know that I can over come them because if I didn't have a dream then I wouldn't be able to believe and I consider myself lucky that I'm passionate about something and that it gives me joy and that's all I want. 

The £nd~ :)

Creativity Project #1

This collage, sums up the basic and essential elements of my life right now. Not only does it symbolize me, but it created me. The pictures above also motivated me to search and tap my full potential in being a talented, modest, human being.  The ideas that make me, is what I like to do. For instance, the idea of creating and performing music is a big factor of who I am in my life. Also, the idea-no; the instinct of spending time with my family and the reason for who I am today. The only object in the college is purposely my piano. That is no doubt the most prized and important object I have in my possession. In today’s society, I feel that I break a whole bunch of a stereotypes and go beyond the limitations of what an Asian male like myself is suppose to be doing. One of the stereotypes that I do break is for a Filipino and/or Asian is being very conservative. For me, it is the complete opposite; a bunch of my friends observed and seen that I’ve been pretty out and easy going to communicate with. I’m less timid than what my physical image may perceive. An important stereotype that I actually embrace is my academic level. Just like in class last Wednesday, we saw an Asian kid with an A+ paper in his hand. Pretty stereotypical, except that would not be me. I am a B/A- student that actually does struggle with academics in many areas while juggling a music career. I’d rather be that than be a one dimensional person. My parents came to this country for my brother and I to create our own special image and to live life the way we want. Not to be another product of our society’s environment. The artistic decisions I made was why the pictures are in certain areas. Having a selfie on the left hand side purposely. It is on the left side because I write with my left hand and I chose that picture because it is the most recent nice picture of myself. The picture on the top left defies that I love to travel. That was in Disney World two years ago, February 2014. The second picture is my family. The third and fourth is some of my several shots of performing. The top two iconic, while I saw the bottom two due to the best for lasts. I chose those pictures because those were the best ones that symbolized who I am at this point of my life. I want the viewer to see what I love to do and to see versatility in me being outgoing, my interest in fashion, my family, and my passion for music. My image challenge stereotype in relation to what Stuart Hall says my pictures are much more unexpected and eccentric to what is expected for an Asian male to present.

  
 

I am, what I like to say kindred, spiritual, and very loving. This picture identifies me simply that I one with my surroundings. My posture is stiff  but yet elegant. The energies around me blend and all come together. The "tribal make up" is done on my own. To me it is mystical, edgy, and also representing vines of the Earth wrapping across my face as the symbol of moon drops down. This represents Lady Luna, whom in Wicca is the moon goddess. My face paint in total represents the tranquility of life all coming into one. With the elements of Earth water and fire, everything flows, everything is peace. The lighting of the picture, yes is dim and dark, for that represents the part of myself that I tend to hide. At times it may wrap itself around me, but with my posture it is firm, strong. I am grounded, and for the stones and crystals that surround me(concept of Mother Earth) is my protection and guidance in life. In all generally I feel generally that the concepts of peace, love spirituality, creativity and so forth defines who I am. I am love, I am Earth.

Who am I? Well I am a cat, and cats have all the power in the world if you ask me. I like to demonstrate my femininity in a fierce and edgy fashion. My demonstration of pointing my pitchfork towards the viewer is my thoughts upon myself as a King. Ever since I was young always dreamt of being royalty. As normal girls wanted to be a princess I wanted to be a King. As well as for me pulling off make up from my face. I am releasing myself from the idea of cosmetics and the "ideal" world. Showing my true self is what is important. Who I am, I am a purely delicate, fierce, a woman who can hold her own, and guid herself through anything to gain success. I am a designer, creator, and abstract minded individual. Most importantly and most seriously a feline. They make up the part of me that is majestic, graceful, playful, and as well as beautiful. Everything about them, to their regal manor, mesmerizes me and that is what know is me.

Creativity Project #1

For this project I choose to create a collage using the works of art i created in high school art class. Reason being because a part of me is made up of my love for art and because my works of art big or small contain a fragment or big piece of me, in one work of art in particular was made from the emotions I had towards the subject of my artwork which is my dog,Hershey. At the time he lived with my grandmother in Mexico and i saw him for maybe a month or so a year. And not only do i love most animals but I also love nature(except insects,arachnids or snakes) so i decided to incorporate them in the art piece i made since it reminded me of Mexico in a personal way. Shortly after he was given away for certain reasons and in a sense the feeling i had to make it dedicated to him was right, which is why i feel more especially attached to the artwork. My other works of art also had emotions and hard work but were made in a totally different perspective than the one of my dog. Such as the collage i titled as “fear” includes what i believe in a sense or what i imagine to be in the dark, both maybe figuratively and literally. I decided to show what i feel, which i believe is the side to me no one gets to see and in the center of everything is what everybody perceives,which the fact that it’s in black and white helps show that that’s not the full version of me and that art brings out some of my inner colors that paints my world and helps create who i am. Stuart Hall talks about stereotypes and how images can show, spread and in a way immortalize the ideas. My collage doesn’t use the place I'm from as a way to show who i am,because although my parents are from Mexico, meaning i am Mexican-American,and am not ashamed of it,i decide to give other things the spotlight to show who i am and what makes me. Because I am more than just a place.

Me

I want to start by saying that I really love myself; I love my womanhood, my blackness, every kink in my hair, being the child of my parents, the way I think, the perspective of the world that I have, where I come from and where I see myself going. Everyone should love themselves in this way, it's only healthy. Knowing yourself, looking at yourself honestly, loving yourself and putting that person first have all become things I view as the utmost important things one can do for themselves. Having said that, even with this "love thyself" belief I have, there is something that I've struggled with since one whom I thought was one of my best friends started teasing me in the second grade. He provided the seed and I planted it. Second grade was the first time I questioned if I really was

Growing up, I was surrounded by images of "proud blackness." We were raised knowing our history, African art and mud clothes on the walls, annual Kwanzaa celebrations and ceremonies, natural hair (before the "movement") and positive role models. So, I've never questioned or have been ashamed of that aspect of myself. What I've struggled with is body image. I feel so foolish for having this problem considering I've always told my sisters, little cousins and students to fully love who you are. And I full heartedly believe this but when it ones to myself, there is this dark, ugly voice that tells me that I and this aspect of myself is an exception. And with this, I get so frustrated and upset with this weakness that I allow myself to have. But when you're in a family of model looking cousins (some of which have literally modeled), and sisters who don't have my problem we can't help but think "one of these things are not like the others." I then have this sense of inferiority that I just can't shake. Then the question arrises: "why don't I just change?" This is a complicated question that has internal and external reasons. I can cite my internal and external, physical reasons but I'd just dismiss them as excuses. Yet, here I am. Battling myself on a daily basis, not being able to look at my reflection with finding about 10 problems per minute.

I say all of this in writing about my personal self view because when we were asked to list those 5 words, one of the first two was "fat." Some use that word with pride and I applaud that but I haven't gotten there. I tell myself to wear it like a scarlet letter that I deserve. I've allowed myself to become this grotesque thing that is obvious when anyone looks at me. Just last night, my little cousin called me beautiful and I brushed it off with a joke. I can't get to that point that I tell her to be in everyday. And yet, in that same night, another cousin of mine grabs my leg and says "you're fat." This hypocrisy and self-hatred is so ingrained in me that I feel I can't stop. I know I revealed quite a bit in this blog posting but I'm okay with that. It is my truth and it is a huge aspect of who I am. Additionally, I know it's a plight that many people, especially women of color, deal with constantly.
                                      

When you gave the assignment, I knew exactly what I was going to create. I know the assignment was to create a piece that reflects how we view ourselves but a major part of that "self-view" has been molded by how I'm viewed by others. I hate myself for this but it is my truth that I live in.
When Shervone Neckles came in to share her work, one comment that stuck with me was her memory of her first doll being white. What came to mind was the doll experiment conducted in the 70s that was later re-created a few years ago. I personally, always chose and had black dolls because, of the options provided, they looked the most like me. Yet, even with those black dolls, I was never fully represented. So, I used the disproportionate and unrealistic model of the Mattel barbie. From my "beloved" kinks to my curves, I wasn't fully represented. The paper I have surrounding the doll is from an article by satoshi kanazawa who sought to explain why Black are physically less attractive than all other races of people. The excerpt I chose specifically discusses our average BMI. Honestly, I wasn't shocked or hurt by this person's ignorance. I of course don't share his ridiculous, insulting, unsounded, racist and sexist views but it is a view shared with many. This made my re-evaluate the way I've chosen to foolishly go on viewing myself. Specific words were chosen to be included from the excerpts. I cut out bantu knots out of a cover of Black Hair magazine. When I was younger, I was always confused as to why this magazine always focused on processed "fried, lyed and dyed" hair about 98% of the time. It has changed slightly to be more reflective of the "neo-natural hair movement" but not enough and not for any other reason than trend. In the background is a rastafarian flag to show the pride I have of my predominantly Jamaican heritage. I colored in the doll with black marker because I thought I was dark skinned when I was younger only to be crushed and told I'm a "nice medium brown", with envy, by a cousin straight from Jamaica with the gorgeous dark skin I thought I had. About the doll are glasses representing spectators. I am fully aware of what most see when they look at me. 

Who? Me?

Dijonai, EnglishWho? Me Cut and Past Transparent

    My cut and past artwork is all about me and how others make a snap judgement about me. As you here I used a Calla Lily flower as my background. This Calla Lily represents me in many way that I know of because, I see myself as sweet, still growing, very tall, up lifting and  sometimes hard to figure out. I choose the Calla Lily flower because it's my favorite out of all flowers. This flowers comes from native to southern Africa in Lesotho,South Africa, and Swaziland. A mass of roots herb plant that lives for more than two years. Evergreen where rainfall and temperatures are adequate, deciduous where there is a dry season. Its preferred habitat is in streams and ponds or on the banks. It grows to 0.6–1 m (2.0–3.3 ft) tall, with large clumps of broad, arrow shaped dark green leaves up to 45 cm (18 in) long. The inflorescence's are large and are produced in spring, summer and autumn, with a pure white spathe and a yellow spadix . The spadix produces a faint, sweet fragrance. Also  suited to cool climates such as the British Isles and north-western United States.
     On the top of my background lay, who I am as a person. As shown above, the Transparent pictures are converse sneakers, all types of heels, outfits I love, a shy emoji, Carmelo Anthony, and Fashion. These images describes me the best because I am a shy person (Shy Emoji), I don't really like speaking to people as much, but knowing what I want in life there is always someone I have to speak too to get to what I want to achieve. (Fashion) I love fashion because it connects with me. Fashion come naturally, I never have to think about it in the ways of what wrong and correct its just a way for me to express myself and it make me feel good that I'm good at what I know about Fashion. Including the outfits and types of heels. Carmelo Anthony is my favorite basketball player he inspires me because he play this hard obstacle in his life called basketball playoffs. Basketball is something I watched with my older brother and nephews, we connect when we watch basketball. I played basketball when I was in elementary school, the only female on my team that could actually play, but this was something I was sure about because basketball was something I played because I enjoyed the game. I quite basketball when I got to middle school because I wasn't interested anymore. Fashion became a huge part of my life. Gemini is my Zodiac sign, it define me about a person, it as define me as a twin. Our birthday is May 22. We are fraternal twin, we do not like alike, but we resemble each other. My twin is the evil side of me I believe because I'm too nice of a person and I'm very sensitive. She my Yin to my Yang.
       Outside of my Calla Lily flower are picture that aren't transparent because these are image of what people see me as. I put picture of famous people such as Zendaya and Aaliyah because family members and close friends always tell me I remind them of these two. I never really notice, I hear it all the time even from people I don't know. I put Skylar Diggins and a basketball because people always asked me "Do you play basketball?" and I always answer with the same answer no, but I used too or they would ask me "Do you want to play basketball?". I mean I love basketball, but I can't picture myself playing it my whole life. I put pictures of me when I was in these fashion shows I volunteered for because this is what people always view me as. I love modeling because I get to wear these lovely designed clothes people I know design and want me to wear to show to others. I'm still trying to figure out who I am because I always have two different views of anything and I cannot ever pick a side, I agree with both. I'm shy, but outgoing. I love being alone, but I love the company. I'm nice, but I'm always angry. I'm happy, but sometimes depress. It's like I will always have a different side from myself and that's what makes me, Me and I will never change Who I am for Who? Me?.

Creative Project #1

Trying to encompass every aspect of my life, and what defines me as a person is very difficult. I identify as many different things, a student, worker, Japanese American and musician are what I believe to be the four main aspects of my life. This photograph captures one aspect of my life, pictured above is every single vinyl release I have played on over the past 5 years, 11 Ep's and 3 full length LP's. This is the music I have written and recorded in the various bands I have played in. This is the entire hard copy discography of my musical career.
What I believe makes this an artwork is that this is the first time I have ever compiled everything into one photographic shot. These records generally just sit in a shelf at home, rarely do I take them out. Putting these records together in one place has forced me to reflect on everything I have done over the past 5 years of my life.
With this photograph I am trying to show the viewer a snippet of my life, recording music and releasing it in vinyl format is very important to me and I wanted to make that clear by showing the amount of output I have had in such a short period of time. For my materials I decided it would be best to use the physical copies of the records I have.
Stuart Hall writes that stereotypes, reduces, essentializes, naturalizes  and fixes the people that they are directed towards. This photograph is a direct and honest representation of a very important aspect of my life. It is not a stereotype, it does not reduce my life to a small group of traits, it is the physical proof of what I have accomplished with my music.

Project

This is a self-portrait of me in the city and I’m going to show my “complex” identity with this. I put quotes around complex because I’m actually the complete opposite of the word complex, I like to keep things simple. Since I am a simple person, I just used one photo without making collages or put art because it may be confusing. The ideas that make myself who I am and who I'm going to be is in this photo by explaining what I'm working towards. I’m not sure if a picture is considered art but if it is, I would consider myself as the art in progress. In this photo you are able to see me in a nice view of the city, this is a big part of my identity/future identity because I want to live a luxuries life. I believe you can tell a lot by a person about how they want to live in the future and by the way they achieve their goals. Another part of the photo I can tell you about my identity is the way my face is in this picture. I believe I am a serious person that only jokes around very little. Stuart Hall talks about stereotypes and I believe the biggest stereotype about Chinese people is that we are cheap and we have restaurants or stores. That stereotype doesn't apply to me because I want to do something bigger, I want to be in some type of business industry. This is how I want people see to me and that's why I represented myself in a city because the city has a lot of meaning.

P.S I didn't draw this. It was just a photo with a drawing effect.

WHO AM I?

Who Am I? Well thats a secret that only the few who takes the time to figure it out can really know. I decided after many other fails of choice, to take a picture of what i hold closely to my heart. The books are my obsession with Young Adult novels and the princess cup shows how much i love Princess Tiana but also that's my coffee cup I never drink coffee around the house without it. (Im also obsessed with coffee). The pooch on top is my baby, my snowball, my teddy bear , ect. His name is Terrie and he is a maltese, he was meant to be the "Family" dog but he is my dog. I stole his love and now he is mine.Behind him is a photography wall within my room, i have some of my favorite pictures from the past year up on the wall.These pictures once stood in my old High  school art gallery. In the right hand side sits a small framed picture of me and one of my best friends that ive known since grade school at prom. 

I chose the medium as photography since that is my only artistic field that that i dont suck at. And clearly i am loving it. Over the years ive been jumping around through different interests and my family sees it as inconsistency but in reality im just looking for what and where do I fit in. By combining these five objects im showing the peices of my life that represents who i am. 

This is my self portrait.

To be able to explain myself, I have to first show all the things that make me up.

 My friends, my family, and my art form. 

On the top left, is a picture of my and my friends on twin day at school. We all wore white shirts and Adidas pants and converse in an awful attempt at being quintuplets. 

At the top right, is a family picture that we took at Daytona beach. 

(My family has never taken an entire group shot, so this was kind of a big deal for us.)

The two middle pictures, show my love for theater and playwriting. On the left, is a picture of the sign posted on the door of the room we used when I workshopped my first full length play. On the right side is a picture of me and some friends going to see Les Miserables in broadway. 

On the bottom left is a picture of my last performance with my Bass Clarinet. And last but not least at the bottom right, is a picture of me and my boyfriend on picture day our senior year in high school.  

As my medium, I chose to use pictures because I can't draw and you can get way more detail out of me through photography. By combining these six pictures, I showed the most important things that make me up. I believe that the people you surround yourself with and the things you decide to spend your time doing are what make you, you. By using these pictures I'm able to show you what I spend my time doing and with whom. To me I feel that I don't live up to any stereotypes. As a Dominican and Puerto Rican young woman living in the projects in Bed Stuy, I'm expected to be pregnant on my second kid, being in the street getting into trouble. Instead I spend my time going to school, seeing shows, writing, and spending time with the important people in my life.

Hopefully when people look at the collage, they see someone who cares about people and how expression helped them find something that they love.

Creative Project #1

        For this creative project, I decided to draw to represent myself. Since, I am a student I chose pencil to represent myself. Pencil helps me to write/draw my thoughts and  express my feelings. Same as, I chose earphone because I love to listen to music because it helps me to feel calm and relax. The artistic decision that I chose to make, a broken pencil and heavily tangled earphone.The reason I chose a broken pencil because I think it represents me as a person who is not good at writing. In addition, I chose heavily tangled earphone because it represents my feelings and emotion about how difficulties, confusion, and pressure that I am having when I am weak in English.  I want viewers to see that what situation that I am going through. It's been always hard for me to settle down in new places because everything changes such as culture, community, friends, and lifestyle etc.. I think this is not only my problem, I guess every international student has the same problem as mine. However, Some international students who are lucky enough to receive a good quality of education back in their country, they don't have to face difficulties same as the student who did not get a good education. Therefore, while I was making this drawing I felt so vulnerable to people who are new to this country.There are some people out there, who rush to snap judgment on people based on their color, religion, appearance, skills, and culture etc. It relates to Stuart Hall's idea, that how people stereotype of people based on where they are  from.

creative project #1

I decided to draw a representation of how I view myself but also including a strangers perspective of me, from that I divided a face in two halves. The left of the face is an owl along with my current short hair on top. I believe I best represent an owl from my lack of interaction with others, I pay attention to detail, and I don't speak yet keep my ideas and imaginations in my head. My reason for adding the short hair is to show its still me but there will be occasional moments when someone will make it obvious and show a confused or glaring look if I'm a female or male from the way I dress and my decision on the haircut I chose. Glancing over to the right is my past self with long hair. Sure I did love my long thick hair but I ask, Why do women have to represent themselves in a way to show its acceptable? This is how a woman should behave, act, dress, and look. There is pressure on a female in today's society. We're neglected or told to step down from our strong propositions which is why I draw a closed mouth on the right of my face. I'm quickly judged on my appearance but can't they forget for one second and just know that I'm a regular person just like your sister, girlfriend, friend,  and peer. Going back to my past self on the right I also drew a thought bubble showing my interests and what kind of person I am. My piece relates to Stuart Hall,cultural theorist, sociologist believes stereotyping reduces, essentializes, naturalizes and fixes difference. My idea relates to Stuart Hall's idea, from the pre-conceived idea of how a woman should act and dress.